Today’s Reading: Helaman 5:1-26
And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.
I was 15 or 16, finally developing a testimony of my own. But that testimony was still young, my roots were shallow.
One day, while at church, an adult member accused me of committing a major sin–one I was not guilty of. He even threatened to tell the bishop. I was shocked and deeply offended. I ran to the bathroom and cried my eyes out. I couldn’t bring myself to attend class with red-rimmed eyes and splotchy cheeks, so I went home.
As I sat on my bed and continued to sob, my mind reeled from what just took place. I was trying so hard to be good! How could I be accused of something so awful?! Were my righteous efforts all for naught? What’s the point in keeping the commandments if I’m just going to be accused of breaking them? How can I ever go back to church again? How can I face that individual again?
I got off the bed, and pointed myself toward the kitchen–hoping to drown my sorrows in food. As I walked across the room, I caught my reflection in the dresser mirror–and stopped. As I looked at myself, a feeling of peace washed over me and the bitterness melted away. I felt as though the Lord knew me and was pleased with my efforts.
Then the thought came to mind– “you have worked on building your faith. But who or what is your faith based on?” I reflected on this question and realized that my faith should not be based on the goodness and perfection of man, but in the Goodness and perfection of my Savior. Although it was great to be buoyed up by my fellow saints, my motive for attending church wasn’t simply to have a fabulous social experience. What was my goal? Surely it wasn’t to convince others that I was the pinnacle of perfection! My purpose in attending church was worshiping, covenant keeping, and drawing closer to the Lord. At that moment, I decided that the words or actions of another person wouldn’t keep me from attending my meetings.
Joseph B. Wirthlin’s words are clear on this subject:
We often hear of members who have separated themselves from the Church because some leader, teacher, or member has said or done something to offend them. Others have had their faith shaken when the Brethren have taken a stand with which they disagree. In such cases, I wonder about the faith of those people and whether it was grounded securely in a testimony of the Lord, Jesus Christ. The ultimate focus of our devotion must properly be our Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son.
Because we’re imperfect, we are all bound to offend and feel offended at different junctures in our lives. Other trials may threaten to destroy our faith as well. But at those times (and always), I hope we will cling to the Lord–our rock, our foundation. He is sure, and with him. . . we cannot fall.
After growing up in the bitter cold of Alberta Canada and serving a mission in the scalding heat of Tucson Arizona, I finally settled for the “moderate” climate of Utah. I met my best friend and love of my life at BYU where I received my degree in Marriage and Family Studies. I stay at home with my two little girls, teach marriage classes with my husband, and run an alumni Facebook group. I love to write, bake, travel, teach, and feast upon the words of Christ, but my favorite happy thought of all is going on weekly dates with my husband!
So powerful Courtney. I so look forward to your posts and this did not disappoint. Loved it. Thank you for continuing to teach me!!