Book of Mormon: Day 141: He Mourned With Me

Today’s Reading: Mosiah 18:1-27

9 Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life—

Back in high school I had my first exclusive boyfriend–a good Mormon boy. (I know, we’re not supposed to date exclusively as teens. . .but we did anyway). We were absolutely head-over-heels twitterpated with each other. After being together for quite some time though, he broke up with me. Talk about devastating my poor 16-year-old heart!  After he dropped me off, I ran up the stairs of our empty house and threw myself on the bed. I soaked my pillow with my tears and sobbed uncontrollably for a long, long time.

I reflected on my feelings at that moment and realized I felt so unloved, so rejected. Immediately I sought to replace those feelings with love and acceptance. I got up, picked up the phone and called my dad. I was so hysterical  that I couldn’t even say “hi”. My Dad didn’t even know who was calling him. He just stayed on the line, silent, confused, and trying to make sense of the noise he was hearing. After a couple of minutes I was able to summon enough breath to wail the word “Daaaaaaad!” “Courtney?” He asked. I’ll be right there. He didn’t yet know the problem, but he knew I needed him. So he ran to me. . .to succor me [i]. Now that might sound like no big deal to you, but it was a big deal. My parents were divorced and my dad lived in a different city. He was also out for dinner at a restaurant with his new wife and some friends. They had just ordered, but he fled the restaurant to come to my aid. He could have waited until the social event had come to a close, he could have at least waited for his food, but he didn’t. He ran to me. An hour later he picked me up. He drove to a park and parked his vehicle. We just sat there in that car and I cried and cried while he listened. He rubbed my back as I told him what happened.

I will never forget what he did for me that night. And what stands out to me is that he first mourned with me. He ran to my aid and was sad with me and for me. At some point later on, he probably said something like “you know sweetie, I know it’s hard to see it right now, but there are going to be other great guys who will come along, and when you meet and marry one of those great guys, this won’t matter so much anymore”. And he was right–more than a decade later I married an AMAZING Mormon boy :)! But what I want to emphasize is that my Dad saved those words of comfort until after he mourned. . . because that’s what I needed.

I once heard that the injunction “to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort,” is given in that order for a reason. We first need to mourn with others–it’s OK for all of God’s children to feel sad, upset, lost, and maybe even angry. As Jeffrey R. Holland said:

“Everyone is going to be anxious or downhearted on occasion. The Book of Mormon says Ammon and his brethren were depressed at a very difficult time, and so can the rest of us be.”

[Heavenly Father] doesn’t immediately try to make it better, he listens to me first. . . But inevitably he . . . always come[s] back and teach[es] me about his son, Jesus Christ. –Chris Williams

Courtney Parker

After growing up in the bitter cold of Alberta Canada and serving a mission in the scalding heat of Tucson Arizona, I finally settled for the “moderate” climate of Utah. I met my best friend and love of my life at BYU where I received my degree in Marriage and Family Studies. I stay at home with my two little girls, teach marriage classes with my husband, and run an alumni Facebook group. I love to write, bake, travel, teach, and feast upon the words of Christ, but my favorite happy thought of all is going on weekly dates with my husband!